May 12

Mothering in these last 6 months has been difficult at best, and many times downright hopeless. I was rather unsure whether or not one of the chips would even decide to celebrate Mother’s Day. (they did)

I have wanted to just give up on so many different occasions, but I am just stubborn enough not to. Oh, but I am here to say that there have been days, days that I have wanted to just crawl in my bed, pull the covers over and not come out….ever. Clearly, I am made of stiffer stuff and have slogged through.

I hate slogging. The whole putting one foot in front of the other. Forcing yourself to move in the direction that you really care not to go. Slogging forces you to dig deep within yourself, and the longer you slog, the deeper you have to go. It is depressing, it is mind numbing, and it is not a place that I ever thought that I’d be.

Here I am, armpit deep in it all, everyday wishing that God would just pluck me out, set me in a happy place and I can be done with it all. That isn’t reality. The reality is, is that he is right beside me, covered in the mire, just like I am. Holding my hand, letting me know that He is with me. every. step. of. the. way.

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chocolatechic

Just an average wife, mother, and homeschooling woman

15 thoughts on “May 12”

  1. Amen.

    Moment by moment, we must choose to believe what is TRUE, rather than what our minds or hurting hearts are telling us.

  2. Oh Honey, I so feel your pain, many times I in the mire with you. I think every parent has times when they can’t see their way out of the tunnel but it is there. Many hugs.

  3. Awww, there certainly are ups and downs to motherhood. Just know, that it’ll get better…it will! It’s wonderful to know that wherever we are, even in hell, God is with us.

  4. Oh I can completely relate! I have a daughter that is graduating and this semester has been so trying to all of us and especially hard for me due to so many different variables in our home. I feel much the same way – many many days! Just keep plugging along AND praying! There have been many nights that I spend the hours praying for guidance and peace, while I listen to everyone around me (including the cat) snore…

  5. Hey, those teenage years are HARD. But I’m betting you’ve provided a firm foundation and you’ll all come through just fine. Now that all mine are grown, I’m amazed and thrilled with what really wonderful people they have become. Hang in there. It will happen to you, too, someday.

  6. I have no clue how you managed to keep afloat through one teenager but several… well there simply aren’t words for that kind of bravery. I like what a friend of ours said recently when asked how she had raised five children as a single parent (her husband died very young and she never remarried). Her reply: “I just did it. I cried. I laughed. I went a little crazy. But in the end: I just did it.”

    Excellent.

    Please know that you are firmly in my prayers.

    Blessings!
    Lacy

  7. I have been deep in the mire these days myself…it’s so hard sometimes yet so comforting to know that the Lord loves my kids even more than I do and wants only the best for them also!

    We will get through these years and have wonderfully productive, respectful, wise children someday…I just keep reminding myself of that!

  8. CC, you’re an awesome mom and I know there is no way you will give up on your precious kiddo’s. To hear you talk to them when I’m on the phone with you is to hear love just pouring out. I hope they know how wonderful you are and never take you for granted.

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