My sister tells me that my nephew has acquired a hamster.
The boy has had 3.
The first one that we got, was so cute. We got the aquarium, wheel, food and some bedding along with him…..for free. Now I know just why the woman was so eager to hand me over all those things WITH the hamster.
When we got Coal the hamster, the boy was so excited. He held it and petted it and loved it….till nightfall. Bedtime arrived and we put Coal to bed. Only, we weren’t aware that hamsters are nocturnal, and they love to run on their squeaky wheels ALL. NIGHT. LONG! The boy wasn’t getting much sleep, so Coal came to live in our bedroom. The noise was awful, so we got him a plastic wheel. Wouldn’t you know it, hamsters love to CHEW plastic wheels, rendering them unusable. Coal lived to a ripe old age of 9 months.~~most likely due to all the plastic he ingested, and the death wishes I chanted every night because of the noise~~ On the sad day of his passing, the boy brought him to me…mostly stiff. Teary eyed~~have you seen that boys eyes? They are blue, a brilliant blue and those lashes…it is criminal! When tears form, the word no vanishes from my brain~~he asks me “can you make him live?” It had just so happened that I had watched some animal rescue show where some small animal was almost dead. They put heat lamps on it, and did CPR.
So, I did what any mom would do with a teary blue eyed boy looking up at her. I got a towel, a lamp and laid Coal under the heat, thinking the entire time, please let this work, please let this work. That seemed to help for awhile, then Coal relapsed, so…. I swallowed hard and performed CPR all the while the boy is watching hopefully. He died within minutes. Hey! I never claimed to be a miracle worker.
Butter arrived at our house weeks later. It was at this point in time that I insisted that the rodent live in the boys room, regardless of noise. Junior lived to a ripe old age of 1 and a half. Junior caught a cold in his eye. I taught the boy how to wipe Butter’s eye so he could see. Something terribly wrong happened in the night and Butter lost his eye. I couldn’t let him live like that. It was just gross. I briefly considered bludgeoning it to death, but I was fearful of the nightmares that would ensue…him squealing at me from my dreams…..no, it just wouldn’t work. So I did the next best thing. I called my mother, but she didn’t have any other ideas. There was only one option left. I had to put it out of it’s misery. So, we all said goodbye. I wrapped him up in an old dish towel, and secured it with a rubber band. I took him outside, laid him on the ground and shot him with my husband’s 9mm. Yes, this gentle chocolate loving, beautiful children having, house repairing woman is a murder.
Butter Junior came to us weeks later. By this time we are total pros at hamster parenting. We had a ball for him to run around in during the day…..hoping against hope that it would wear him out so that he would sleep at night…, we oiled the wheel, and had found the perfect bedding for him, and made toys out of sticks. Junior was a Houdini though. We had to put bricks on top of his cage so he couldn’t escape. He had other plans. Junior made his escape one night, and he was never seen again. The boy was devastated. Till one morning the husband had to go to the basement to prime the well pump. As he was squatting, waiting for the pump to prime, he saw a movement out of the corner of his eye. It was a mouse. Following quickly on the mouse’s heels was Junior. I’d like to be able to say that Junior brought all his hamster/mouse babies back to see us, but it was not to be. I guess he had heard about the murder.
So, Andra, take a pet rescue class, brush up on your CPR skills, make sure that you have plenty of oil for squeaky wheels, get a gun, and if your hamster runs away……let him go! He will be much happier, and so will you! I promise! Trust me on this one!
Did you have a pet growing up?